According to Handy, being able to communicate so clearly with others is what makes human beings superior to the rest of the animal kingdom. The ability to express in words and gestures, especially if it is with the right people is a priceless boon. A good conversation is more stimulating to the brain and more rejuvenating to the mind than anything else. There are times when people make certain mistakes that can kill the conversation.
Given below are some fatal mistakes that you must avoid to keep the conversation steady and fruitful:
- Gestures say it all- If you are looking elsewhere while someone is speaking to you, it is a clear indication that you are not interested in the talk. Similarly, fake smiles and uncomfortable postures speak very openly about your disinterest in the dialogue. A meaningful conversation always has eye contact between the speaker and the listener. The body language should show an interest in the conversation which is obvious to everyone around too.
- Conversation is not a monologue- You might love to speak but if you keep talking without giving a chance to the other person, you are actually killing the conversation. Conversing is a two-way affair wherein both parties should get time to speak their mind. If you are only the listener or the speaker, it is more of a monologue than a genuine conversation. Such a situation, more often than not, kills a conversation.
- Giving out unwanted advice– When someone is in a problem and speaks to you about it let them get it out of their system first. If you begin to advise or sermon them when all they wanted was a patient listener, you can kill the conversation. Give out advice only when asked for. Any unwarranted ones are not only impolite but also a conversation sealer.
- Be a good listener- While in a conversation, show an interest in what the other person has to say. Speak appropriately in order to encourage the speaker and give your inputs to show you are enjoying the conversation. If you change the topic abruptly or always voice your disagreement with the speaker, it is not a healthy sign for the conversation.
It also makes you seem impolite or aggressive as far as they are concerned. Also, do not cut their speech to continue with your own. Wait for your chance to present your opinion.
- Self-praising attitude– You might have a really high opinion of yourself but remember, no one likes to hear you brag about it. If you are doing well, wait for others to acknowledge it rather than indulging in heaping praises of your own self. It shows that you lack etiquette and is also a conversation killer because no one likes to hear that. Try to speak about things that you think might interest others as well. Choose a common topic of interest in a conversation to maintain the flow.
A good and meaningful conversation is like food to the soul. You dwell on the words even long after the conversation has ended. Handy believes that following some useful tips can make you a good conversationalist. Make a mark on others while you are at it.